The plane ride was really OK.  Also, before the flight, I also met a Dr. who works with Samaritan’s Purse.  I had a little problem with the earphones.  Apparently I pulled them out too hard and left the earbud in my ear.  I didn’t realize it for quite some time, then discovered I had something in my ear.  Everytime I tried to get it out, it went in further.  I knew I had to leave it alone, but I wasn’t sure I could make the whole flight without going berserk with something in my ear.  I then remembered that I had this Dr. friend on board (surgeon, too). But I didn’t kow what we could use to get the earbud out of my ear.  It suddeny came to me to try to use the end of my earring.  Dr. “Sam” twisted it into a hook, and with a litttle work got the earbud out!  Was I ever grateful.

I’m going to try to lad some pictures up to my blog, so I’ll either send that to tell you about my basically uneventful arrival in Ethiopia and my first exposure to the other side of the world.

Hi baby,
So I hear just because Jon was not highly articulate on the phone when he was asking you for a date, that you are not so into him now.  Talk about men being shallow!  Come on girl.  Keep an open mind and remember that it is the heart that matters.  Allow yourself to get to know him.  He is not some marketing project you are analyzing.

I love you anyway.

Mom

Backstory: My mom is a middle aged surburban white woman who works as the school secretary for a private catholic school.  She attends daily Mass and prays the rosary three times a day.  She doesn’t drink or smoke.  Her only vice is rap music, but she does pray for Eminem’s immortal soul.

Dude. I am TOTALLY in need of an Eminem CD for the ride home from work today!   I tried to buy one at the Springfield Mall and there is not even any place to buy music there anymore!    Do you think Brandon could hook me up with one again?

Love,

Mom

I will have to check your birth certificate.  I think you were born around dinner time but I am not absolutely sure.  I do know that you arrived as soon as I got to the hospital.  Assume around 7 pm unless I tell you differently.  I thought geneology was a legitimate subject for you to get into but astrology?  Yikes.  Are you going to open up a little shop and read tarot cards?  Perhaps you can get a job as Sarah Palin’s astrologer if she gets elected V.P.  (Remember that Nancy Reagan had an astrologer).

I could do any.  But, here’s my preferences:

Fuga/    Massage/Facial

Spacio/    Haircut/Massage

Spa Soak/    Massage/Pedi

Nirvana/       Facial/Pedi

Lincoln Park/    Bliss for 2 and Twinkle Toes for 2

Pick whichever is easiest to find………and to get to.

I don’t do “Brazilian Bikini Waxes”.

And, your sister has a toenail fungus.  Can’t get a pedi.

Love you,

Mom

Backstory: I got a raise.  Also, my fiance is convinced our bathroom is haunted because a friend wrote redrum on the wall before we painted.

You should be damn grateful; the stock market is crashing left and right and huge companies are collapsing around us and they keep giving you more money.  What a life!!!!  Really, I know you work hard but the country is in such a mess right now it makes people wonder if they should even have their money in the bank at all.  I was thinking about opening an account with AIG after all the ads, and they had to be bailed out by the government yesterday.  The stock market is taking major nose dives and people are losing investments, retirement accounts they worked all their lives for.  So, be grateful.

I do think it’s funny that Aaron would be freaking out about the noises he says he heard in the bathroom.  Maybe you need to hang a religious picture over the word on the wall. LOL.

I played with a kid’s iphone today…a marvel.  But it seems you still need a computer for pics.  But it did everything but the laundry.
Love, mom

i’m off to fair tomorrow.  Grandpa is taking 2 shirts to wear since when he gets nervous he has a odor.  m

I was talking to your sister today and she said she had a bladder infection. I said HOO BOY! You are in for a real ride! I warned her that the antibiotics might give her a yeast infection and I thought she was going to start crying. So then I told her “No sex for you and J.!” Ha Ha!! Really though I can’t believe Lauren would even touch someone that homely!

I hope you’re being good and drinking lots of cranberry juice as bladder infections run in the family. You have to be careful to wipe front to back and pee after sex! Trust me I know!

Love, Mom
xoxo

Backstory: M. is her co-worker and D. is her boss.

m. and I are trying to think of a prank to pull on d.  There’s is currently a bucket of water (catching a leak) in the opera house attic that has a rotten rat floating in it.   we want to plant a fake rat and some gut juice or something near his desk.  Any creative ideas??

Hey How are you today? I’m waiting for my last load of wash to finish and take it to Gramma’s because my dryer crapped out. I’m trying to get all of it done so everything will be clean when we go to the Cape, so I did about two loads before i realized the dryer crapped out… I thought I just forgot to turn it on. SO SHIT. I ‘m aggravated. I have to take four loads of wet laundry to Gramma’s when I have all this other shit to do.   Any way did you get up enough nerve to e-mail hot subway boy? Did you hear back? I hope you did.  Talk to you later Love Mom.

We have left you a couple of voice mails on your phone but have not heard back from you so…. I thought I would send a little email.  I am sure you are busy and actually have a life so I am not worried just wanted to wish you a happy birthday in person or at least in voice.  I cannot believe that I am old enough to have children 31 and 29 years old.  I think you both must be aging in dog years!  I knew you’d like that one.  Any way, HAPPY BIRTHDAY, to my sweet daughter.
Love you lots and lots
mom

Dear Red Sox Nation,
I was able to get up close to the Red Sox team today, literally 5-6 feet away, at the starting point of the parade, which is across the street from where I work. I saw them all and it was wicked awesome and there was confetti everywhere and music that made the crowd rock. So there you have it–a day in the life of yo mamma! Dave, I hope you are now safely esconsed in the arms of your West Coast loved ones…..
Love,
Mom

Now that I look at the subject line above, that word could also be some kind of plumber’s joke, but it is the name of a dessert…… so I guess it is an addictive dessert.
Found it while thumbing through cookbook at slow open house, and meant to share it with you earlier; I’m afraid to make it!

BUTTERCRACK
Oven at 325
Crust:
3/4 stick butter, melted
1 Box Butter Receipe Cake Mix
2 Eggs
Mix crust ingredients by hand until well blended. Batter will be very thick. Press into well greased 9x 13 pan.

Filling:
3/4 stick butter, melted
1 Box Powdered Sugar
1 8oz pkg. Cream Cheese
2 Eggs
Blend filling ingredients with mixer until smooth. Pour over unbaked crust. Bake 55 min. @ 325 or until light golden brown. Cool completely and serve.

Good morning, sweetie:

How was the rest of your weekend (after the slightly strange call Fri nite) ?  What was that all about anyways ?  Just sitting around recalling false memories ? I am soooo tired, up since 3 AM, we had big winds (the rest of Ike, I guess), power out.  The wind was so loud we could not sleep.  I am at work, in the wrong pants – looked like the right ones by flashlight !  My hair is interesting, as all I could do was kinda wet it down with my hands.  Luckily we did not have any damage that we could see. Just a bunch of stuff in the yard blown around, and a bright blue tarp that we are not sure where it came from !  Wow, what a night !

Love you,

Mom

Backstory: My dad is a high school principal.  The band kids got new t-shirts.

Hello Love,
Your father and I just watched American Pie.  We now know what “this one time at band camp…” means.  Now your dad is going to have to tell those band girls they are not allowed to wear those shirts.  Why didn’t you tell me what it meant?  Do girls now-a-days really do that with their instruments??  Oh god, I hope they wash them before they put their mouth on them!
Love u,
Mom

at first your brother didn’t like some of his classes (no neighborhood friends) and the advisory class is EMOS and druggies he said, so who is he supposed to talk to.  i had to text mary to find out what emos are after he left the house. she said kind of like goth, all dressed in black except goth wears baggy black from head to toe and tons of bangle jewelry, necklaces, etc. and piercings, while emos wear skin tight black and want to cut themselves.
how the heck do they know this? word really gets around. james informed me of the latter part. “cut” themselves, i said i didn’t believe that.  i walked around all last year and only noticed maybe two typical goth kids.  and they are actually good students, in orchestra and smart, just totally from another planet of course.