Mom: So, I have some relationship advice for you.
Me: Yes?
Mom: Don’t marry anyone you’re not attracted to.
Me: WHAT?
Mom: Actually, don’t even date them.
Me: Is this supposed to be news?
Mom: Well, my marriage might have worked out a little better if I had actually been attracted to your father.
Me: WHAT?
Mom: Yeah, he looked like this guy I knew in high school who was really nice but not attractive at all. But I thought he would be a good father.
Me: I still can’t believe it took you 47 years to figure out that it might be a good idea to be attracted to the person you marry.
Mom: Well no one ever told me!
This makes me sad
January 8, 2009 at 1:07 pm
Tell me about it. No one ever told me, either; thus, my first marriage. My present marriage is *much* better. The submitter should be glad her mom is telling her. Also, she should be glad that she didn’t need to be told. :-)
January 9, 2009 at 12:35 am
My mom was raised in an orphanage in the 30’s. No one told her ANYthing about birth control, other than abstain. So, she had almost no info for me, but when I was in college I learned ALL about birth control including history of it etc. I told her about what I was learning and she was SO grateful. She didn’t know ANY of that stuff. Remember kiddies, those older generations were doing the best they could with what they were given. :o)
January 9, 2009 at 11:53 am
What would make you want to spend the rest of your life with someone you are not the least bit attracted too??? What made this poor woman marry someone she was not attracted too? There has to be some kind of spark or chemistry for people to make that kind of commitment, and back in her day it really was a committment for life, not like it is today, you know, well if it doens’t work out we can always get a divorce, or they don’t even bother to get married anymore that way if it doesn’t work out no messy divorce. I hope this mom finds some kind of happiness.
January 9, 2009 at 12:52 pm
Wow, thanks for the super-judgy post, JeffreyG! Not that it’s your business, but I married my first husband, to whom I was not attracted, because I had really low self-esteem and thought that was the best I could do. Also, my parents didn’t like each other very much, so I thought it was normal not to like the person you were married to. And no, like *most* people, I didn’t think “Well, we can get divorced later if it doesn’t work out.” Seriously, who thinks like that? I am very, very grateful, however, that the option of divorce exists, because I’d be absolutely miserable right now instead of happily married. If you think I should still be miserable because I used to hate myself, you can suck it.
January 10, 2009 at 2:31 pm
JM-he said he hopes the Mom finds some kind of happiness! Not that she should still be miserable.
January 10, 2009 at 4:31 pm
That exchange is proof that we really should not have moms on this site, especially from which postcards are taken. :-(
January 12, 2009 at 3:52 pm