Backstory: I was telling my mom about how I broke up with the guy I was dating the day before Valentine’s Day.

Mom: So are you still going to vday dinner with him?
Me: No, of course not.
Mom: Well, then you can go to church.
Me: What? So I’m not alone on vday?
Mom: No, to meet men. There are plenty of nice men at church. Or your local synagogue.
Me: Oh god. What about my local mosque?
Mom: No. I can’t picture you in a burqa.