Backstory: I have just come out of a long term relationship and was making the most of being single. This was sent around 8 a.m.

Mum: Are you at home?
Me: No
Mum: I know your not, I drove past your house and your car wasn’t there.
Me: Then why ask?
Mum: I was checking to see if you were going to try and lie to me.
Me: Why would I do that?
Mum: TART!