Highest Rated Posts (last 7 days)
“Sex and Defenders”
Mom: I’ve been getting into law shows lately.
Me: Which ones?
Mom: Sex and Defenders.
Me: ….what? Is that like some kind of warped Judge Judy?
Mom: No, they investigate sex crimes. And they go to court a lot. There are two separate groups.
Me:…you mean Law & Order: Special Victims Unit?!
Mom: No. Every episode begins with a “dun dun.”
Me: Yeah, that’s Law & Order. Here’s a youtube link of the opening.
Mom: Ok, that’s the one.
Something to Tell the Police
Have fun at the beach!!! Please keep in touch with me, I’d like to be able to tell the police where to start looking for the body
Macho Died With Your Father
Mom: I found a box in the attic full of your Dad’s Fields & Streams magazine collection. They are from 1976 through 1981 and surely are worth something, do you want them? Course some of them are missing pages because he would take these on his fishing trips and would pull pages out to use as toilet paper. He was such a macho man (sigh).
Me: Mom, I don’t even know how to respond to this so I’ll just say no thanks.
Mom: What? I thought his machoness was kinda hot.
Me: Trust me, it’s not and no one say’s “macho” anymore.
Mom: So you’re saying machoness died with your father?
Me: Um, ok, I’ll go with that.
Blind Date (Just as a Friend)
Dont call me crazy but a met a hispanic pastor that is 28 and I like y to met him when y come to SA I like y to has a blind date just as a friend I like his spirit is in the right place Think about it Im going to Austin on Friday to a church during the day can we have lunch or a coffee?
