YourFace
Mom: You know, it’s a good thing I don’t have a YourFace account, because then I would be on the internet all day long.
Me: Ummm… MySpace?
Mom: Oh yeah, I guess that’s it.
Dam(n) Tour
We enjoyed the Dam tour. It was damn interesting. OOOPS! That was a curse word. The history was fascinating. Then we went to Vegas. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Let’s see, we arrived at our non-casino hotel in the afternoon. Daddy returned the rental car. We walked to Applebee’s and had dinner. It was CRAZY DELICIOUS. Then TV and lights out at 7:20. We are pathetic, aren’t we?
Love,
Mom
Time For An ITYS
Your room looks nice - make sure you check the heating unit doesn’t get blocked by the sheets. Your bed looks good higher, what’s under it?
Dad says you wish you had a rug. Hmmm, time for an ITYS*.
love you,
Mom
*Mom lingo for I told you so.
A “Bong”
Do you know what a “bong” is? I’m reading a police report that came in and have no idea what that is.
Momma About to go Berserk
The plane ride was really OK. Also, before the flight, I also met a Dr. who works with Samaritan’s Purse. I had a little problem with the earphones. Apparently I pulled them out too hard and left the earbud in my ear. I didn’t realize it for quite some time, then discovered I had something in my ear. Everytime I tried to get it out, it went in further. I knew I had to leave it alone, but I wasn’t sure I could make the whole flight without going berserk with something in my ear. I then remembered that I had this Dr. friend on board (surgeon, too). But I didn’t kow what we could use to get the earbud out of my ear. It suddeny came to me to try to use the end of my earring. Dr. “Sam” twisted it into a hook, and with a litttle work got the earbud out! Was I ever grateful.
I’m going to try to lad some pictures up to my blog, so I’ll either send that to tell you about my basically uneventful arrival in Ethiopia and my first exposure to the other side of the world.
It Is the Heart That Matters
Hi baby,
So I hear just because Jon was not highly articulate on the phone when he was asking you for a date, that you are not so into him now. Talk about men being shallow! Come on girl. Keep an open mind and remember that it is the heart that matters. Allow yourself to get to know him. He is not some marketing project you are analyzing.
I love you anyway.
Mom
When Mom Works With High Schoolers
mom: she [the boss] sent him home yesterday. he got off probation on wed so he smoked the W and was puking his guts up all over the street
me: umm get out
mom: well he is a VERY bad boy
even thought he keeps telling me he’s a man I keep telling him then he needs to start acting like one
Mom’s Love for Eminem
Backstory: My mom is a middle aged surburban white woman who works as the school secretary for a private catholic school. She attends daily Mass and prays the rosary three times a day. She doesn’t drink or smoke. Her only vice is rap music, but she does pray for Eminem’s immortal soul.
Dude. I am TOTALLY in need of an Eminem CD for the ride home from work today! I tried to buy one at the Springfield Mall and there is not even any place to buy music there anymore! Do you think Brandon could hook me up with one again?
Love,
Mom
Sarah Palin’s Astrologer?
I will have to check your birth certificate. I think you were born around dinner time but I am not absolutely sure. I do know that you arrived as soon as I got to the hospital. Assume around 7 pm unless I tell you differently. I thought geneology was a legitimate subject for you to get into but astrology? Yikes. Are you going to open up a little shop and read tarot cards? Perhaps you can get a job as Sarah Palin’s astrologer if she gets elected V.P. (Remember that Nancy Reagan had an astrologer).
No Brazilian Bikini Waxes, Please
I could do any. But, here’s my preferences:
Fuga/ Massage/Facial
Spacio/ Haircut/Massage
Spa Soak/ Massage/Pedi
Nirvana/ Facial/Pedi
Lincoln Park/ Bliss for 2 and Twinkle Toes for 2
Pick whichever is easiest to find………and to get to.
I don’t do “Brazilian Bikini Waxes”.
And, your sister has a toenail fungus. Can’t get a pedi.
Love you,
Mom