Jort Alert
Backstory: After having to explain to my Spanish boyfriend what ‘jorts’ are, he decided to find the best example he could and post a picture on facebook. This is my mom’s reaction after seeing it.
your mother loves you and that jort picture is amazing… i never want to hear any comments about my hulk hogan culottes again.
Grandma’s Drinking Advice
Backstory: I had a wild night out and fell and hit my head, causing a slight concussion that lasted a week or so. Apparently someone told my 95-year-old grandma.
Sorry to hear you had a fall and slight concussion. Some advice from your grandmother (grandmothers always do this-give advice I mean) Learn to party in moderation. You will have more fun
Like Hot Dog Misses Mustard
Backstory: I hadn’t talked to her in, oh, a couple of hours.
You mad at me/ or just kinda of a poopie head? I wish you would call me, or write. I miss you like coffee misses cream, like a hot dog misses mustard, whenever you eat one, in that weird ketchup way.
What to do With Skype
Backstory: It was my mom’s idea to video chat. She suggested Skype in the first place.
I downloaded Skype just now but I don’t know what to do now. This is putting technology in the hands of a 61 year old woman. yeaks!!!!!
What if I wanted to talk to you in my bathrobe?
No Marriage in Heaven
Grandma: I can’t wait to see your grandpa again in heaven someday.
Me: You know grandma, according to the Bible, there is no marriage in heaven.
Grandma: What, so everybody’s a floozy? Even better!
Weather Report Calls for Apocalypse
How was your day yesterday? Are you having much rain? According to the weather on tv, all of Calif. is going to be buried in a mud slide or float into the ocean. Take care and have a great time, but be careful. Love-Mom
Full of Life :o)
Me: Mom I’ve gained soo much weight in the past months. I need to start working out, or maybe just starve myself.
Mom: Sweetie, no you’re fine. You’re just full of Life :o)
Checking in with Oprah
Backstory: My mother was new to internet/e-mail and only learned so she could communicate with me while I spent a year in Nigeria working with Doctors without Borders.
I used the www to find Oprah’s email. I wrote her an email. I explained that I wasn’t just writing to be on the show (I’m sure lots of people do that) but since she was the only person I knew who had been to Africa I wanted to see if she thought you would be safe. No word back…yet.
Love,
Mom
For the Love of Painkillers
Backstory: My mom sent me a thermometer at school because everyone is getting sick. I texted her back to tell her I already had one, and to ask her if she wanted me to return the extra one. She just had foot surgery and is a little loopy.
Me: Much appreciated but I actually already had a thermometer. Do you want me to bring the extra home?
Mom: Keep it. some day You may want to verify temp orally and rectally ;)
Me: What is wrong with you!! Did they amputate your soul when they operated on your foot????
Mom: PERCOCET!!!!
Just Catching Up
hey,
just some catchin’ up..
Have you eaten any of the soups?
Who are your 3 closest friends at this point in time down there?
What are your thoughts on UM so far?
How do you feel about people using foul language on Facebook?
Do you think you can find a place somewhere down there for your hair…?
Have you looked into any other events or ministries? Non-profits things, volunteer events, etc?
How is the writing center? What can they provide?
What’s the food you most eat on campus?
When do you find out about the international program??
Did you ever get your surfboard over to Tay’s place?
Do you know why your cat meows SO loud???
Which class do you find most interesting?
How is the literature class coming?
Have you figured out your professors yet-what they are looking for in a test or paper?
Have you spoken with all of your teachers personally?
Have you made any friends in your classes?
OK, enough for now. Would love to hear from you.
Have a great day,
Mom
