Barstow » Postcards From Yo Momma

Express Train to Barstow

Backstory: my mom and I joke about me sending her to a nursing home in Barstow when she has “senior moments.”

Last night I bit my tongue really hard and this morning sneezed and peed in my pj’s. When you come home you might want to look into Barstow for me.

Posted on 03.24.2009 at 9:30 am// Tagged: Barstow, depends, growing old

"My grandma is always talking about all of these low-fat recipes she makes, then criticizes me for not slathering butter all over the bread when I make grilled cheese."
— Josh
on "Home Cookin’"
- Butt Dialing, Septic Tanks, Valentines. (4)
  - A Mom: We do this because we think about you all the time. We run-on our sentences, eschew...
  - KMc: My mom sends emails like this too! She writes in her own shorthand language that I...
  - Patrick: I think the response ‘roger’ is appropriate.
- How Mom REALLY Feels About Sesame Street (2)
  - Cat: hahaha that’s my mom! :-)
  - Terry: Laughing, soda dripping down my chin.
- The Joys of Aging (1)
  - Anj: Oh dear. 62 is not old! :) LOL on the bowels…
Past 7 Days Past 30 Days 6 Months All Time
- 1. In Case of Charles Manson +5
- 2. I Have Fun Too +4
- 3. Mom’s Hip with the Lingo +2
— view all —
- 1. Good Luck with Your Mutant Ear +18
- 2. Do You Need Therapy Now? +10
- 3. The Joys of Aging +9
- 4. Way Harsh, Mom +9
- 5. Happy Milk Day +8
- 6. We’re Gone For A Day, We Might Die +8
- 7. Christ in a Clown Suit +7
- 8. How Mom REALLY Feels About Sesame Street +7
- 9. Butt Dialing, Septic Tanks, Valentines. +5
- 10. In Case of Charles Manson +5
— view all —
- 1. Climbing & Unwrapping Are Skills of Mine +30
- 2. Flip Flops, Taco Bell–Your Generation’s Going to Hell +26
- 3. What is a “Cannabis User”? +22
- 4. Patience Is a Virtue +22
- 5. If I Die, Tell Them What I Ate +21
- 6. I Didn’t Just Fall Off the Turnip Truck +21
- 7. You’re the Best Adult Vomiter I Know +21
- 8. Trick or Treat? +19
- 9. Have I lost my “Hotness” ? +19
- 10. Your New Criteria: No Prison Record, Not a Lawyer +18
— view all —
- 1. Don’t Passive-Aggressive-Smile-Face-ME +1496
- 2. Mom, Dad and Facebook: A Dangerous Combo +1162
- 3. Get me out of here! +1054
- 4. Hear me…RABBITS. +1015
- 5. The Grown-Ass Woman’s Club +1014
- 6. What Mom Learned From AARP +973
- 7. Sometimes a Snake is Just a Snake +951
- 8. How to Save Your Marriage +911
- 9. Spring Cleaning? +871
- 10. What Men Want +813
— view all —
Past 7 Days Past 30 Days 6 Months All Time
- 1. I Have Fun Too (0)
- 2. I Have Fun Too (0)
- 3. In Case of Charles Manson (0)
- 4. In Case of Charles Manson (0)
- 5. Mom's Hip with the Lingo (0)
- 6. Mom's Hip with the Lingo (0)
- 1. Butt Dialing, Septic Tanks, Valentines. (4)
- 2. Christ in a Clown Suit (3)
- 3. Do You Need Therapy Now? (2)
- 4. How Mom REALLY Feels About Sesame Street (2)
- 5. We're Gone For A Day, We Might Die (1)
- 6. The Joys of Aging (1)
- 7. Good Luck with Your Mutant Ear (0)
- 8. Good Luck with Your Mutant Ear (0)
- 9. Good Luck with Your Mutant Ear (0)
- 10. Christ in a Clown Suit (0)
- 1. What is a "Cannabis User"? (9)
- 2. If I Die, Tell Them What I Ate (7)
- 3. Hurricane Preparedness (5)
- 4. Call Me Crazy (5)
- 5. It's Not Called Mom's Nipple Book (5)
- 6. Mom's Mind Is Out to Sea (5)
- 7. Your New Criteria: No Prison Record, Not a Lawyer (4)
- 8. The Great Paranoid Pumpkin (4)
- 9. Dude!! It's Your Daughter's Wedding. (4)
- 10. Butt Dialing, Septic Tanks, Valentines. (4)
- 1. Where Are You From? (182)
- 2. Today in Mom News: How Did You Choose Your Child's Name? (132)
- 3. First You Pierce Your Nose, Then You Have Illegitimate Children (98)
- 4. Grandma Can't Be Bothered? (77)
- 5. Don't Passive-Aggressive-Smile-Face-ME (76)
- 6. Does Your Mom Buy You Undies Every Year? (72)
- 7. And you are becoming a male hater (70)
- 8. Who is the Baby Daddy? (57)
- 9. Mom the Grammar Nazi (52)
- 10. The Grown-Ass Woman's Club (49)
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Express Train to Barstow

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