Hope you are having a great day.  I don’t remember having such a great day about this time 27 years ago!  (My exact quote: “Give me drugs, I don’t care if she is brain damaged for life.”)  But I love you anyway. I’ll call this evening.  Love, Mom

Tomorrow is your birthday…yady yady pooh pooh

Backstory: Typical gifts to me from my brother include an air mattress inflater (I don’t own an air mattress), a vinyl Playboy purse, and a used Maglight

I KNOW that I am SUCH a Mother – control-freak – however: please remember to get your brother a card, do not need to get a gift. A home-made from the computer or otherwise would be great.  I know that he can be delinquent at times with tangible things BUT, at times, he seems to live on the perifory(?) of our family relationships and I want us to really embrace and focus on him for his 30th B’day.  It is a ‘Mother thing’ and I promise that y’all are not left out of the ‘Mother thing’ at certain times.   Better stop, while I THINK? I am ahead!  XOXOXO  MAMA

Do not forget that tomorrow is the 40th birthday of your brother. Rub it in. He would do the same for you!
-Mom

D,

i asked dad what to get him for his birthday, he said he wanted a steak and a blowjob… i said “should i tell D then?” and he said, “oh…. i will think of something else.” i’ll let you know.. but i think he needs a new hoodie.

love,
mom

You know…food, drink, play…at our house. Did you have something else in mind? You could tell me what you want for food and a birthday dessert and I’d make you bloody marys or whatever. You could pass out and I wouldn’t let anyone take your picture and post it on the internet.

I would so much appreciate if you called or wrote to Dad for his birthday.  And, despite any under the mustache grumbling on his part, I know he would, too.

So far I am thinking of getting him a banana plant.  Is that too subtle?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I REMEMBER WHEN WE WENT TO PROSKA PARK FOR YOU BIRTHDAY AND YOU WALKED AROUND IN YOUR UNDERPANTS ONLY CAUSE IT WAS

SO HOT AND THEN WE HAD PIZZA DELIVERED. IT WAS LIKE THE PERFECT BIRTHDAY PARTY. HOPE YOUR DAY IS THAT MUCH FUN AGAIN!

LOVE MOM.

Backstory: My mom has decided to throw a monumental pirate party for her 55th birthday and is going overboard with preparations.

that’s my girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the DUH syndrome inherited from her mommallama!

i finally got the kitchen “nook” cleaned out. NOW everything’s on the kitchen table & counters! hope to get that sorted thru today. going to get the office DONE today also. I BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!! i couldn’t sleep last nite thinking about stuff. i may actually be bi.
polar, that is. racing thoughts. grandiose ideas…i’d be dangerous if i could actually implement all my ideas!

look for any piratey stuff you got at home, any gold or silvery items for the trunk. jewelry. skeleton scarf you knitted andy…

love, mommallama

Notwithstanding a garbage can is a curious birthday gift, it’s needed, has a great dedicated design, more so than the latest crap container I worked out, stores the bags even, fits underneath perfectly, and, in a pinch can lure and trap something I might, in the future, truly desire and love and need to feed.

I felt so bad this morning because when I was getting ready, for some reason I was thinking to myself about how old R will be in February. I thought he was 23 now but then that didn’t make sense that he would be turning 24 when you just turned 26. Then I couldn’t think if J was going to be 25 or what in March. So, I had to subtract 2009 from 1984 and 1986 to figure out how old they were going to be. That’s pretty bad when you can’t remember the exact age of 2 out of 3 of your kids. Sheesh. Love you, baby doll!

G.G. wanted me to tell you that she pooped out a poop in the shape of a C in honor of your birthday. Sorry I didn’t send it out to you – you will just have to take my word for it.

Bye for now

your old Mom