What is a “Cannabis User”?

Backstory: My mother recently discovered craigslist to place tenants in her rental properties. ‘Cieverwenso’ is a slang spanish term in our area for someone who has no shame. I’m not sure if that’s how it’s spelled, but that’s how she spells it.

Mom: Hey what is a cannabis user?
Me: A pothead
Mom: I don’t think so, it was on a craigslist need to rent. The guy said he wanted roomates that were ok with a “cannabis user”
Me: Trust me mom, it means he smokes pot. Cannabis is another word for marijuana.
Mom: Are you sure? Why would he put that kind of information on the internet? People shouldn’t just talk about their drug use in public. Cieverwenso!

Craigslist Jaunt/Potential Murder

Off to yoga and then onto another craigslist jaunt/potential murder to buy some cheap shelving. “Terry” will be the person of interest. Lives on the corner of 10th and Main. All sorts of complicated plans are involved in actually getting there between two other appointments that I have today. All of this just to save ten bucks. If anything goes awry, you can have the new dress I bought for T’s wedding and the lovely shawl I found yesterday ON SALE that matches so beautifully! Earrings, too. Also on sale! What a deal. Just think: all of this great stuff in exchange for my life.


In Case of Craigslist Murder

I’m going to pick up a clay cooker from a guy on Craig’s list. Dad was going to come with me; however, he isn’t feeling well so I’ll probably go alone. I’ve done it before but in case the guy, Russ, (details left on desk by the kitchen phone) hacks up my body and feeds me to the ducks, I want you to know that I love you very much. And if it comes to trial, I think Dad should get the $15 back that I’m paying for the clay pot.

Things Found on Craigslist: Penises

Mom: so yesterday I am looking around craigs list because I have nothing better to do. and I end up looking at pic’s of mens penis’s. great.

Me: ahaha
i love that section

Mom: so, as I’m trying to figure out why on earth it would be so easy to see these penii uncle comes in through the sliding doors behind me.

Me: !!

Mom: I must have jumped two feet, and was trying to get the penis’s off the sreen

Me: geez mom, you’re such a perv

Mom: I don’t ‘know if he saw, so I didn’t know if I should explain! Now he probably thinks I look at porno online!

Me: well, if you have giant penises everywhere, you do!

Mom: oh brother. I have never seen penises online before!

Selling on Craigslist

Mom:  I made my first sale on Craigslist!

Me:  Craigslist, really?  As long as it wasn’t in the “Casual Encounters” department

Mom:  I can’t believe those stupid columns were the hot sellers.  I figured the lamp would go first!  By tonight I will have 10 whole dollars burning a hole in my pocket.  ;)  Whooooo-weeeeee!

Me:  Well don’t spend it all in one place.

Mom:  haha

Mom:  What’s casual encounters

Me:  Um…

Love, Mom