The vest to the cowgirl costume for Lily is tight and she hates it. It was XLarge, the biggest this company makes, I might keep it for Ava because her cow costume is also tight. I could return them but the shipping cost to return and then shipping and handling for something else probably wouldn’t [...]

Mom: It’s funny, I leave food out for the dogs all day and they don’t touch it. They wait until I’m there and then they gorge it all down. They’re like, ‘Karen’s home! Time to eat!’
Me: They call you Karen? Doesn’t that bother you?
Mom: Well, they know I’m not their mom. Actually, I’m sure they [...]

Samantha says she doesn’t want to snuggle.  Says she’s a dog and if you want to snuggle you should be looking for a two legged snuggler.  Says her “mom” would certainly appreciate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Her biological clock is tick, tick, ticking.
See you Saturday.

I’m just up in the room taking a break from the smoke.  And you know my neck starts to hurt after awhile.  Your father’s new kick is blackjack to the tune of 5 bucks a hand.  That’s to rich for my blood, you know me the nickle slots is all I need to have fun.  [...]