double entendres » Postcards From Yo Momma

Sniffing (Bowling) Balls

Mom: Tim got a new bowling ball, and it actually makes a big difference. He’s been doing better with his new ball.
Me: So, your boyfriend has one old ball and one new ball, and the new ball is better.
Mom: Yeah.
Me: I don’t want to hear about your boyfriends balls.
Mom: And what’s really weird is that his new one smells like grapes.
Me: You can get bowling balls scented?
Mom: Yeah, which I didn’t know either. Then I went around the bowling alley sniffing everyones balls.

Posted on 11.17.2009 at 11:30 am// Tagged: bowling, double entendres

It’s So Hot…

Backstory: My mom had posted something on her Facebook account about how hot it is where we live, and this is how she replied to someone agreeing with her.

The squirrels need pot holders to hold their nuts!

Posted on 07.01.2009 at 11:30 am// Tagged: double entendres, squirrels, weather

Stool?

At first glance I thought you were concerned about your bowels.

The stool is lovely – great color. I noticed in the lower right of the bottom of the page they have a black version of your mushroom table.

Your home is coming together nicely.

Posted on 04.22.2009 at 1:30 pm// Tagged: double entendres, poop jokes

The Main Course

mom: sounds good to me, does he need a birthday dessert??
me: sure, how about a fortune cookie?
mom: i guess only if you are the fortune cookie–hee hee
me: OH MY GOD.
mom: lighten up –jk, jk…………
me: THAT WAS SO GROSS!
mom: why is it so gross, you’re not a little fortune cookie??? you could be a dumpling….or tofu
me: um but not a dessert!
mom: oh you’d rather be the main course??
me: OH MY GOD MOM STOP!

Posted on 01.28.2009 at 11:30 am// Tagged: birthdays, double entendres, sex

"I asked myself the same question many a time during my years of teaching teenage boys! Poor Mom and poor Mr. Harrison.
(No, I never had X is a Penishead written on a desk, thank goodness, but I did have to throw out a dozen textbooks at the end of the year at one point because just about every picture had been, ahem, similarly embellished.)"
— Anne
on "What Did I Do To Deserve This?"
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  - nolalola26: This is adorable.
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— view all —
Past 7 Days Past 30 Days 6 Months All Time
- 1. Something to Tell the Police (6)
- 2. Blind Date (Just as a Friend) (1)
- 3. "Sex and Defenders" (1)
- 4. Macho Died With Your Father (1)
- 5. Blind Date (Just as a Friend) (0)
- 6. Blind Date (Just as a Friend) (0)
- 7. "Sex and Defenders" (0)
- 8. (0)
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Sniffing (Bowling) Balls

It’s So Hot…

Stool?

The Main Course

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