Mom: So how did it go with the tax man and the internet people and the plumber?

Me: Umm, I didn’t make it, I don’t understand it and I delayed it, respectively.

Mom: Please try to get by on your pretty face for as long as you can, darling, because … well … because I think that’s a very good idea.

Me: Thanks, bitch.

Mom: You’re welcome. And it won’t last for much longer, so get what you can now. Thankfully you don’t look like your father. MX