Don’t Worry, I Told Your Ex You’re on Weight Watchers Now

Backstory: My mother recently ran into a guy I dated briefly……

Mom: I saw Fred last night. He’s doing well. I told him you’re doing great. And that you’re on Weight Watchers now.
Me: You told him THAT????
Mom:……yeah….was that bad?

Glad He’s Not Feeling You Up

Backstory: I got this after telling her about my new guy, the first one after I realized the last was gay.

Well, honey… since it took you a year and a half to realize Matt is gay– when I knew it and I’ve never met him face to face… let’s see… I’m not sure you have the best relationship instincts. But, I’m glad you can talk to him. Glad he seems to like you. Glad he’s appreciating you for being an intelligent girl. Glad he’s not feeling you up. Take it from there.

Love, Mom
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