Postcards From Yo Momma » food http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com A repository of modern day maternal correspondence Fri, 10 Feb 2012 16:00:46 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1 Cold Turkey http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/04/25/cold-turkey/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/04/25/cold-turkey/#comments Sun, 25 Apr 2010 14:56:02 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=6160 Backstory: My brother John is a chef and frequently admonishes my mother about the dangers of bacterial spread in food left out on the counter.

I just made the most delicious enchiladas I’ve  ever eaten!
Ground turkey with seasonings, enchilada sauce,  black beans, white corn, vegetarian refried beans, a sprinkle of cheddar, and sauteed red and green jalapenos, in a whole wheat tortilla with lettuce…….heavenly!!!

However if daddy and I die from eating them (ground turkey thawed on the counter ALL DAY) please give John permission to speak at my funeral and say that he told me SO.

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/04/25/cold-turkey/feed/ 10 Veganism=Meat Fast http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/04/09/veganismmeat-fast/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/04/09/veganismmeat-fast/#comments Fri, 09 Apr 2010 19:10:16 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=6097 Backstory: I asked my mom what she thought about me becoming vegan.

Sounds good! Kind of like a meat fast, huh? Just don’t be a freak about it.

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/04/09/veganismmeat-fast/feed/ 0 What’s Coffee Without Cream Like? http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/03/12/whats-coffee-without-cream-like/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/03/12/whats-coffee-without-cream-like/#comments Fri, 12 Mar 2010 15:01:39 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=5967 I’m trying to do coffee w/out cream & artificial sweetner and it’s like toast w/out butter or sex w/out penis…

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/03/12/whats-coffee-without-cream-like/feed/ 5 Dessert Psychological Warfare http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/02/20/dessert-psychological-warfare/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/02/20/dessert-psychological-warfare/#comments Sat, 20 Feb 2010 17:30:01 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=5828 So, I just made brownies and they came out as thin as pancakes! When I serve them tomorrow night, say, “Oh. you made miniature chocolate bites! I love them!”. They taste good and, if you don’t think of them as brownies, they’re fine!
LOVE
XOXOXOXOXO
Mom
aka crazy lady

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/02/20/dessert-psychological-warfare/feed/ 1 Powdered Milk Will Rot Your Body http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/01/12/powdered-milk-will-rot-your-body/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/01/12/powdered-milk-will-rot-your-body/#comments Tue, 12 Jan 2010 18:30:23 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=5584 Mom: maybe i just wont come then
Me: no crackers either
omigod
Mom: powdered creamer?
Me: yeah
Mom: do not use that crap ever
you stay away from that
is so so so bad for you
omg
rot your body
sigh
Me: i dont use it ever
Mom: no coffee
Me: i have soy milk
Mom: omg
i am upset now
soy???????????
double ugh

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2010/01/12/powdered-milk-will-rot-your-body/feed/ 0 Can’t Clean Without the Queen http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/12/19/cant-clean-without-the-queen/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/12/19/cant-clean-without-the-queen/#comments Sat, 19 Dec 2009 17:30:01 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=5461 Hi honey,
Well we need to go shopping for a new Aretha cd. To get myself in the cleaning mode, I always put her on and now she skips. How do I clean without the queen?

Got us crab legs and sparking wine for dinner tomorrow nite. mmmm

See you in the am.

love, love

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/12/19/cant-clean-without-the-queen/feed/ 8 Supper Club http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/12/02/supper-club/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/12/02/supper-club/#comments Wed, 02 Dec 2009 18:36:44 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=5360 Backstory: I had asked what was for dinner.

Well, I paid for steak which we did not eat last night and I will not be here tomorrow because I have a meeting at 5:30..Then, I also bought a pork roast, which I had tapped for Wed. Plus, there are turkey sausages for turkey lasagna…Then, I have another meeting Friday… When would you be here tonight? Plus, I am ordering Christmas gifts and planning when to buy the donations for the giving tre…And I have not even bought anything for you ,daddy, etc….When would you arrive? Tonight is the football game.

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/12/02/supper-club/feed/ 4 The Cupboard is Always Bare http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/11/18/the-cupboard-is-always-bare/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/11/18/the-cupboard-is-always-bare/#comments Wed, 18 Nov 2009 14:32:50 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=5283 Backstory: My mother is notorious for never having any edible food in her house. We’re not sure how she survives.

Me: i’ll come over but i bet you don’t even have anything for breakfast
Mom: I do too! I have lots of food!
Me: Yeah?
Mom: I have an egg
(pause)
Mom: I have brownies!
Me: Really? I’ll eat brownies for breakfast no prob
Mom: Oh, they’re not made, it’s a mix.
Mom: And it calls for two eggs, oops. Maybe you should eat before you get here.
Me: I have no idea how I lived to adulthood in your care.

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/11/18/the-cupboard-is-always-bare/feed/ 6 Time for Dinner http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/21/time-for-dinner/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/21/time-for-dinner/#comments Wed, 21 Oct 2009 19:09:17 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=5097 Mom: Do you want to have dinner at V’s or just grab something quick?
Me: Tonight? I am eating right now.
Mom: Oops, wrong kid.
Me: I figured it was something like that.
Mom: Good thing I’m not Jon/Kate plus 8

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/21/time-for-dinner/feed/ 2 New Rules for Sunday Dinner http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/13/new-rules-for-sunday-dinner/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/13/new-rules-for-sunday-dinner/#comments Tue, 13 Oct 2009 13:30:02 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=5029 Backstory: We have been eating dinner at my parent’s house every Sunday since my sister and I moved out.

Thanks for the soup recipe K, It sound delicious!
This brings me to the next topic, Sunday dinner.
Lately it exhausts me to cook Sunday dinner, sooooo I have decided that it will become one pot Sunday dinner and everyone will take a turn.  We will have dinners that take only one or two pots to make, like spaghetti, redbeans, soup, stew, etc.  Put your recipe thinking caps on girls and get ready to cook. Next Sunday is J’s turn! K, you get dessert. I get the day off, however I will buy ingredients but you need to get me a list by Saturdays at noon. And I will have the booze. HAhaha
Happy searching
Love, Mom

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/13/new-rules-for-sunday-dinner/feed/ 4 Skinny Bitch=Great Pooping http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/01/skinny-bitchgreat-pooping/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/01/skinny-bitchgreat-pooping/#comments Thu, 01 Oct 2009 20:26:05 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=4966 Backstory: my mom and i have been sharing our experiences trying recipes from the “Skinny Bitch in the Kitch” cookbook.
(lyvm = love you very much)

Have a really wonderful day! I’m planning on it and feeling good.

BTW–eating word for the day–lentils!  I learned to make this French Lentil salad from the SBintheKitch book–delicious, great pooping, and I lost weight!

lyvm.

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/10/01/skinny-bitchgreat-pooping/feed/ 0 Cracker Barrel Chicken Capers http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/09/18/cracker-barrel-chicken-capers/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/09/18/cracker-barrel-chicken-capers/#comments Fri, 18 Sep 2009 13:31:35 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=4881 I had an experience yesterday that has me thinking of becoming a vegetarian.  Cracker Barrel served me raw chicken and I mean raw.  I had eaten half of it before I noticed and I can think about it now and almost get sick.  The manager said they push a timer when they fry food and that they had pushed the wrong timer.  Your daddy wanted me to throw up, but I’m not good at that.  I’m waiting for my friend e-coli or salmonella to hit.

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/09/18/cracker-barrel-chicken-capers/feed/ 7 Dad’s Zucchini (Not a Euphemism) http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/08/11/dads-zucchini-not-a-euphemism/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/08/11/dads-zucchini-not-a-euphemism/#comments Tue, 11 Aug 2009 13:58:40 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=4661 dad's zucchini We just picked Daddy’s one and only Zucchini.  We’re going to make it for dinner.  Look at the size compared to daddy’s foot.  Nice pedicure, HUH!!!

Love,
Us

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/08/11/dads-zucchini-not-a-euphemism/feed/ 3 Temptresses! http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/07/02/temptresses/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/07/02/temptresses/#comments Thu, 02 Jul 2009 16:06:20 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=4380 so which one of you temptresses left an ice cream cake in the freezer.   my dilemma:   coffee vs. ice cream for breakfast.     demon children!!!!!

m

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/07/02/temptresses/feed/ 9 Kitchen Kapers http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/25/kitchen-kapers/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/25/kitchen-kapers/#comments Mon, 25 May 2009 13:34:14 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=4121 Okay, so I’m standing in front of the counter here where we keep the coffee pot, fridge and microwave, warming up some coffee and eating some cherries, and a cherry pit drops out of my mouth, onto the floor, in between the wall and the fridge. There’s not enough room for me to stick my hand in there to get it, so I go get my ruler. I stick the ruler down there and I’m swatting around the pit disappears under the fridge. So, I start thinking gee,it might attract bugs, so I get down on the floor on my stomach with the ruler, and I let out this huge fart, and I burst out laughing and spit all over the wall, and I never did find the pit.

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/25/kitchen-kapers/feed/ 8 You Are Keeping Yourself Occupied, but Not Regular http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/22/you-are-keeping-yourself-occupied-but-not-regular/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/22/you-are-keeping-yourself-occupied-but-not-regular/#comments Fri, 22 May 2009 13:30:38 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=4105 Your neurotic mother is concerned about your bowels. Granola bars and a roll for4 days is not adequate. Can’t you find any fruit? Please, at least get some juice. Of course, I would be happy if you got in a little protein. Isn’t there a market where you cold get some wonderful bread and ham? Do you have a kitchen in your flat? Take a little red pill if you need.

Are you sleeping? Are you over your jet lag?

I’ll call you this w/e. Just let me know when it would be best. Sounds like you are keeping yourself occupied. Buy yourself a ganga deal. You deserve it.

Love you,
Mama

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/22/you-are-keeping-yourself-occupied-but-not-regular/feed/ 3 Paging Rachael Ray http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/07/paging-rachael-ray/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/07/paging-rachael-ray/#comments Thu, 07 May 2009 13:32:26 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=3984 Backstory: My mom sent me this in an email after a weekend of not so great cooking.

I have decided to boycott the kitchen for a while since my cooking skills (and level of interest in it) have both disappeared like that stimulas package we were suppose to receive. Between the failed crabmeat au gratin, burnt & greasy fried chicken, over cooked squash, I’m done for a while. Did manage to come thru on the milk gravy but now you know how to fix it. Cans of soup & PB&J all sound just fine to me. See you Friday, mom

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/05/07/paging-rachael-ray/feed/ 1 Preparing Meals for the Grandson http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/03/27/preparing-meals-for-the-grandson/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/03/27/preparing-meals-for-the-grandson/#comments Fri, 27 Mar 2009 18:45:16 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=3643 Backstory: Here’s what happens when you do provide a grandchild, and then agree to leave that small person with your parents for a week so you can go away.  (Please know I got this maybe 5 minutes after my mom and I rang off)

What vegetables does he like? Baked Beans?,salad? stewed tom? fresh tomatoes, carrots, celery, Fruit; peaches and pears i know he likes; what others? Flavors ice cream? Meat? Hot dogs? Chinese food? Hamburgers and sloppy joes are all know. Chicken, turkey? chinese food? You roast your potato chunks at 425 degrees for how long? Beef or chicken gravy. Sliced ham? What for sandwiches other than PB?J. What goes in his lunch box?All of this you may already have covered in your notes to me but if not, these are my questions! Love ya Mom

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/03/27/preparing-meals-for-the-grandson/feed/ 11 Mom Knows Too Much About Her Plumber http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/03/06/mom-knows-too-much-about-her-plumber/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/03/06/mom-knows-too-much-about-her-plumber/#comments Fri, 06 Mar 2009 14:00:31 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=3489 yippeeeeeeeeeee

donnie’s son came about 4:30..
he took enough tree roots out of trap to make wigs for 10 bald people!

poor donnie had been in the hospital..they accidentally burned a hole in his colon!
taking polyps out..they ended up taking 12 inches of his colon!

well then i asked for a discount..since it was only in oct he did it..
so he charged 100 bucks instead of 135!

ok..i think i’ll have an icecream cone now..

talk to you both later i hope..

love YOU:)
momxooxox;)

]]> http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/03/06/mom-knows-too-much-about-her-plumber/feed/ 2 Just Chill!!! With the Crawfish Boil http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/02/25/just-chill-with-the-crawfish-boil/ http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/2009/02/25/just-chill-with-the-crawfish-boil/#comments Wed, 25 Feb 2009 20:38:38 +0000 Postcards From Yo Momma http://www.postcardsfromyomomma.com/?p=3417 Backstory: My brother and I both live a couple hours away from our parents, so they’re trying to get us to come in this weekend, with the promise of a crawfish boil. I sent a couple emails to make sure they wanted to do it, and apparently that was a couple too many.

to all of you retarded people; just chill!!! I am very busy at work but we can plan to do something seafood-related on Sat. if everyone is coming in. If crawfish is too expensive, we will go on with another plan. SO all of you just relax and everything will work out as it always does. So, ya’ll come home on Friday evening and we will go from there. Got it??? Love, MOM

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