Backstory: My dad had back surgery, and my mom wanted to update me on his status.

Dad is fine but they r keeping him another night. Still peeing into the pitcher and #2 is being very shy and won’t come out! Thought you’d like to know! Lol

You need to remember to wash your hands frequently even though I think the government and media are over blowing the swine flu “pandemic”. Wash for 20 seconds – that’s the length of the “ABC” song or the first 8 bars of Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen. – MoM

I am very concerned about your health. I am worried that you are not eating properly. Your facebook picture shows you looking very thin. How much do you weigh?
Is it below 140? If I put money in your Emory eagle account will you go eat breakfast?
Are you eating any fresh fruit? Can you go to the grocery and buy a bag of oranges or apples? If this swine flu comes to atlanta, you need to be healthy enough to fight it,and that means you need a strong immunity system, which you can’t have if you aren’t eating healthy.

I am very worried.

Love,
MOM

Just thought since you did not call ME, I would email to let you know I have a stress fracture in my leg near my knee and have to be off my feet for 2 wks. Yeah right, like I have time to do that. See you soon, ME.

Buy some face masks at a pharmacy NOW before they run out.
In Mexico, the masks are being issued to people.
Love,
Mom

it might be nice if you could actually CALL & just see if I am OK. Ruptured ear drums hurt and there will be no phone in my coffin. m

Backstory: My mom was upset that my fiance complained about taking me to the doctor.  I have a condition and I can’t drive myself right now.

He is supposed to be your partner, right?  your future husband?  You have a medical problem and he needs to be there for you and too damn bad if it’s inconvenient for him or takes him out of his way.  that’s what he’s supposed to do.  Who else out there can you depend on if not him?  I don’t care if he’s tired or put out, he should be doing these things because he loves you and he is concerned for your safety and health.  You would do the same and much more for him and I know you already have, my dear.  He needs to grow up, I know you don’t need to hear this right now, but this is the kind of thing that makes me angry when I am already worried about you and hate that you are so far away for me to help you.  Ok, I’m done.  Not quite, he needs to buck up and take care of you.  OK, I’m done now!!!!!  Just tell him he needs to get his ass up early one day and take you to the dr. if you still feel as crappy as you have been by Friday.

I had a CT done today of my stomach. I’m sure it was fine but the patient before me was a possum from the zoo. I have to be the only person in the world that had to wait for a possum to go first for a medical test.

Backstory: I got a prescription for the same anxiety meds my mom is on but I can’t afford to buy them right now. She sent some with my dad when he visited… without him knowing.

There is a big green tub full of your stuff that dad is bringing. When you open it there will be the fox fur coat on top. Inside the pocket is that medication. I put it into one of those teeny tiny ziplocs that extra bottons come in on new clothes. I taped it inside that pocket so it wouldn’t fly out. Please put somewhere safe so kitties don’t get it, since it’s not in a bottle, and dad doesn’t see it. i don’t need a lecture.Maybe you can take that coat out to hang in your room and remove it there. Anway, use sparingly as I don’t know when i can get a new prescription. (Hopefully soon with dad home from work!) I think i put 10 there . Remember, they are 1 mg so you only need 1/2. You shouldn’t take it unless you can get at least 7 or 8 hours of sleep because they are in your system for a while and you will feel groggy next day. You really should try benadryl first.Love, mommy

I know I told you this before but please listen now

Wearing moccosins and flats while running around NYC is NOT GOOD FOR YOUR BACK. You need support so PLEASE wear sneakers and change when you get to work….
You will have knee hip and back problems

and doesn’t your back hurt now? mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm???

love
mom

Hope you’re having a good day. Getting lotsa stuff done here. Going to get my mamms grammed this pm. Wondering if you’d bring some of that kitchen paint so I could see how it looks in here. Thanks, love, mom

Backstory: L is my mom’s friend who died of cancer.

Doll,

I’m so sorry to hear about your foot.  This kind of injury has never happened to me personally but I know of a number of gal pals for whom this was a problem.

First – check with your dr. pals but I believe several sessions of hot-cold-hot is in order to reduce swelling.  I remember that this happened to L and she ended up having the nail removed…and then she died.

Second – STOP DANCING.  If I recall, it’s not one of your strong points anyway so just give it up.  The first thing that came to my mind when I read your tail (foot) of woe was “I wonder what the other guy looks like…” :-D

I love you madly and am eager to hear how the foot progresses.  Can’t wait to see you…7 days away!!

xxoo

yippeeeeeeeeeee

donnie’s son came about 4:30..
he took enough tree roots out of trap to make wigs for 10 bald people!

poor donnie had been in the hospital..they accidentally burned a hole in his colon!
taking polyps out..they ended up taking 12 inches of his colon!

well then i asked for a discount..since it was only in oct he did it..
so he charged 100 bucks instead of 135!

ok..i think i’ll have an icecream cone now..

talk to you both later i hope..

love YOU:)
momxooxox;)

Trev and I love the nose spray, good stuff!  Let me know if you want to do a nasal flush, I hear people are amazed at what comes out.

Dad took me to lunch afterwards. All in all, the procedure itself was a breeze. I just wish that bitch with the needle had told me how much it would burn. They did warn me I might feel light headed after the IV meds kicked in, but that turned out to be a sensation I found surprisingly enjoyable. I bet my hiney was the cutest one all day.

Love you, Bumble! Don’t forget to call me after work.

Backstory: My mom hurt her knee while walking into work… she doesn’t like taking pills and never swears, so dropping the “F Bomb” is her way of saying she was in a lot of pain. PS: I never told her to “man up.”

Trevor. broke out in hives last night! We were a sorry site. Every time I take a step I drop the “F” bomb and he is red polka dots! Next time I get hurt tell me not to “man-up” and be brave and take the pain pills. I wish I would have taken the prescriptions yesterday. I took two Aleve last night and still suffered. Happy Hump to you.