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That’s great about your new job, I’m so proud of you babygirl!
So you know what I was thinking?…you live in the Bronx and work in Manhattan and Derek Jeter lives in Manhattan and works in the Bronx. You should give him a call & get together.
Thought I was getting fired, got a bonus instead.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
YOU ARE THE WORLDS BIGGEST GIRL WHO CRIED WOLF I HAVE EVER KNOWN BUT I LOVE YOU TO PCS. So nice that my lil princess can afford half of her own crown now. muhahhahhah
Backstory: This was mom’s rant about her bosses the day she quit her job at the local newspaper.
I told my boss he was a soul-less suit and walked out. He’s such a tool. He has his head so far up Nancy’s ass and she’s just an old, bitchy, dried-out-uterus hag!
Backstory: I just moved to NYC to be a lawyer. After five years, other states with which NY has reciprocity will allow you to be admitted without taking a bar exam.
me: i’m sick
mom: Oh NO!!!!
me: i know
it’s awful
mom: OV VEY! What about chicken soup?
Are you getting enough sleep, you do have a full schedule? maybe you are allergic to work.
me: i am not getting enough sleep b/c i can’t sleep in the mornings
mom: Actually, I think it is allergic to NY.
You will be cured in 4 years and 10 months when you move back to the midwest.
me: why are you so sure i’ll be moving back to the midwest in 4 yrs and 10 months?
mom: You will have had enough of NYC by then and can grandfather into another state.
The midwest is near your loving family.
me: oy vey
mom: Lucky girl!
me: are you trying out drugs these days or something?
you’re a little nutty
mom: By the way, I am not nuts, I am wise.
Go to bed sweetheart
me: i am
mom: “Oh, Shenandoah”
me: oh lord
mom: “across the wide Missouri” OK, I too am going to try to go to bed. I truly hope you feel better tomorrow. I love you so much, MOM
Hi, luv,
My pleasure! Both of us really like your excellent resume but we hope you don’t mind us mentioning that we feel that “hot” in your e-mail address might deter a serious employer from hiring you. It tends to sound more erotic than professional (more like for a stripper than a fitness instructor). Also, someone might actually be too embarrassed to respond to such an address.
It’s interesting that the references’ addresses are more toned down. Dad suggests: fitveganmomma!
Much love as always and hoping that you won’t take offense.
See you tomorrow, Mum (& Dad) xxx
Backstory: I am saving money to leave on a full time mission for my church but my work doesn’t know that I am leaving. My mother sent an email to my work address asking if I would like to rake leaves for money for my mission fund. I emailed her back saying sure but didn’t she have german class. I also told her to ixnay on the “M” word in work emails… this is here smart alec response.
ok your *o* would appreciate it if you could co*e over on saturday during the day and rake and bag leaves. I dont have to be there…As for ger*an class your aunt and I are going to see a ger*an play at Stratford and to brunch at one of our class*ates.
NEWS FLASH–Your grandmother called me and told me that she would really like to have you and Ben up for Thanksgiving. She also told me, “I suppose I should send her an e-mail. We’ve learned how to get e-mails, of course, but we’re not sure how to give them.”
Give e-mails. That’s so cute.
Call her honey.
I have a meeting with the president so I have to go.
Love you-
Mom
P.S.–Did you know how many certifiably dysfunctional people there are who are gainfully employed? It’s frightening.
bummer dudette, good thing you didn’t jeopardize your current job….keep your spirits up, another will come along. you could be dead…ooh that is ugly isn’t it? I guess I mean its only a job…it could be much worse. phew. Hey Labor day weekend is upon us we have a 3 day weekend.. looking forward to the day off. When we talk I’ll have to tell you about my hissy fit.
HAH!
Love you much!
Me: Up, up, up the corporate ladder I go!
Mom: I would wear a safety belt and helmet.
Backstory: This is my mother’s response to a paper I wrote for work on investing in China.
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are such a professional!! And I read your cooperative education evaluation today while I was waiting for NaNCY IN mARBLEHEAD WITH YOUR CAR. mOMMY
Hi Mootch,
Hope you have a great day. I have an annual forum all day involving professionals in family court — judges, lawyers, mediators, custody evaluators, etc. It’s always fun and an honor too: you have to be invited. I’m a power person.
Love to you.
Momzilla
Backstory: I receive daily updates from my mom who teaches drama at a Catholic Middle School.
Today I’m gearing up to deal with the little diva I made cry yesterday. She was giving 0 percent and had left her script at home and had never attempted to learn any of her lines, even though I told the whole class they needed to have their lines learned by yesterday. GRRRRRR! She’s the girl who missed 10 days of the quarter to go to Hawaii with her parents and a classmate Precious. She probably hasn’t made up any of her work. Very frustrating.
I know now why this job pays so well. OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 100 patients & only about 5 of them aren’t demented. I have to get up at 4am & have to be there at 6:30am! I can’t leave till everything is caught up. Today I didn’t get home till 8pm. It reminds me of the movie, “One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest”. I feel like I was put on the medieval rack. Why can’t I win the lottery so I don’t have to go through this? ************ I liked your posted article on Facebook about the rapist seal. That poor bird!
Love, Mom
