phones » Postcards From Yo Momma

How Texting Works?

I’m trying to call Jessica to get my hair cut but it says her phone is disconnected. Can you text her for me?

Posted on 10.07.2010 at 10:58 am// Tagged: phones, technology, technology fail, texts

There’s an App for THAT?!

Backstory: Mom was trying to learn how to use her new Droid.

Did you know that people are doing sex on their apps?

Posted on 08.10.2010 at 1:01 pm// Tagged: apps, cell phones, droid, phones

Shouty Crackers

Backstory: These messages happened about 30 seconds apart, my mom had just got a new phone and couldn’t work it!

Mom: ARE YOU COMING FOR DINNER ON SUNDAY?
Mom: DID YOU GET MY MESSAGE?
Mom: HELLO?
Me: Blimey mother, what’s with all the shouting?
Mom: WHAT SHOUTING?
Me: When you text all in caps it’s generally considered to be indicative of shouting!!
Mom: OH SORRY
Mom: NEW PHONE. CANT WORK IT!
Mom: I REALLY AM SORRY. NOT SHOUTING. PROMISE.
Mom: I ASKED YOUR FATHER FOR HELP. WE GOT THE SAME PHONE. HE CANT STOP SHOUTING EITHER!

Posted on 05.24.2010 at 1:30 pm// Tagged: all caps, phones, texting

Don’t Work For Naomi Campbell

Well, if it’s a go, then you can take the pay but keep at least your perspective…Don’t work for someone who might throw a phone at you…Love, Mom

Posted on 04.06.2010 at 12:30 pm// Tagged: jobs, perspective, phones

I don’t make this stuff up.

Backstory: my mom has some skin issues on her fingertips and her dermatologist recommended she put super glue on them in the morning so they don’t split.

Mommy thing! I was super gluing my fingers…picked up my phone…glued my thump to the face of the phone…ripped my finger off the phone ..left a nice size piece of skin and glue on the front..got a new phone today!!! No, I don’t make this stuff up. mom

Posted on 04.09.2009 at 11:30 am// Tagged: accidents, phones, super glue

"My grandma is always talking about all of these low-fat recipes she makes, then criticizes me for not slathering butter all over the bread when I make grilled cheese."
— Josh
on "Home Cookin’"
- Butt Dialing, Septic Tanks, Valentines. (4)
  - A Mom: We do this because we think about you all the time. We run-on our sentences, eschew...
  - KMc: My mom sends emails like this too! She writes in her own shorthand language that I...
  - Patrick: I think the response ‘roger’ is appropriate.
- How Mom REALLY Feels About Sesame Street (2)
  - Cat: hahaha that’s my mom! :-)
  - Terry: Laughing, soda dripping down my chin.
- The Joys of Aging (1)
  - Anj: Oh dear. 62 is not old! :) LOL on the bowels…
Past 7 Days Past 30 Days 6 Months All Time
- 1. In Case of Charles Manson +5
- 2. I Have Fun Too +4
- 3. Mom’s Hip with the Lingo +2
— view all —
- 1. Good Luck with Your Mutant Ear +18
- 2. Do You Need Therapy Now? +10
- 3. The Joys of Aging +9
- 4. Way Harsh, Mom +9
- 5. Happy Milk Day +8
- 6. We’re Gone For A Day, We Might Die +8
- 7. Christ in a Clown Suit +7
- 8. How Mom REALLY Feels About Sesame Street +7
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- 2. Flip Flops, Taco Bell–Your Generation’s Going to Hell +26
- 3. What is a “Cannabis User”? +22
- 4. Patience Is a Virtue +22
- 5. If I Die, Tell Them What I Ate +21
- 6. I Didn’t Just Fall Off the Turnip Truck +21
- 7. You’re the Best Adult Vomiter I Know +21
- 8. Trick or Treat? +19
- 9. Have I lost my “Hotness” ? +19
- 10. Your New Criteria: No Prison Record, Not a Lawyer +18
— view all —
- 1. Don’t Passive-Aggressive-Smile-Face-ME +1496
- 2. Mom, Dad and Facebook: A Dangerous Combo +1162
- 3. Get me out of here! +1054
- 4. Hear me…RABBITS. +1015
- 5. The Grown-Ass Woman’s Club +1014
- 6. What Mom Learned From AARP +973
- 7. Sometimes a Snake is Just a Snake +951
- 8. How to Save Your Marriage +911
- 9. Spring Cleaning? +871
- 10. What Men Want +813
— view all —
Past 7 Days Past 30 Days 6 Months All Time
- 1. I Have Fun Too (0)
- 2. I Have Fun Too (0)
- 3. In Case of Charles Manson (0)
- 4. In Case of Charles Manson (0)
- 5. Mom's Hip with the Lingo (0)
- 6. Mom's Hip with the Lingo (0)
- 1. Butt Dialing, Septic Tanks, Valentines. (4)
- 2. Christ in a Clown Suit (3)
- 3. Do You Need Therapy Now? (2)
- 4. How Mom REALLY Feels About Sesame Street (2)
- 5. We're Gone For A Day, We Might Die (1)
- 6. The Joys of Aging (1)
- 7. Good Luck with Your Mutant Ear (0)
- 8. Good Luck with Your Mutant Ear (0)
- 9. Good Luck with Your Mutant Ear (0)
- 10. Christ in a Clown Suit (0)
- 1. What is a "Cannabis User"? (9)
- 2. If I Die, Tell Them What I Ate (7)
- 3. Hurricane Preparedness (5)
- 4. Call Me Crazy (5)
- 5. It's Not Called Mom's Nipple Book (5)
- 6. Mom's Mind Is Out to Sea (5)
- 7. Your New Criteria: No Prison Record, Not a Lawyer (4)
- 8. The Great Paranoid Pumpkin (4)
- 9. Dude!! It's Your Daughter's Wedding. (4)
- 10. Butt Dialing, Septic Tanks, Valentines. (4)
- 1. Where Are You From? (182)
- 2. Today in Mom News: How Did You Choose Your Child's Name? (132)
- 3. First You Pierce Your Nose, Then You Have Illegitimate Children (98)
- 4. Grandma Can't Be Bothered? (77)
- 5. Don't Passive-Aggressive-Smile-Face-ME (76)
- 6. Does Your Mom Buy You Undies Every Year? (72)
- 7. And you are becoming a male hater (70)
- 8. Who is the Baby Daddy? (57)
- 9. Mom the Grammar Nazi (52)
- 10. The Grown-Ass Woman's Club (49)
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How Texting Works?

There’s an App for THAT?!

Shouty Crackers

Don’t Work For Naomi Campbell

I don’t make this stuff up.

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