Backstory: My mother is Chinese - I think some of these are idioms translated poorly.
Mom: I just can not stand the palin’s big mouth and empty brain.
Me: i know
i’m glad you also think she’s stupid
Mom: If McCain dies, she will be our president? So stupid. Why some people think with their foot?
Me: exactly

To celebrate Obama’s win and your new TV I bought you some new towels.  You can thank me later.

Good Morning-’Tis a grand and glorious day in the USA!! Did you have an amazing time last nite? We actually managed to stay up to see the acceptance speech. I wasn’t going to miss it!! I picked up the trib, the sun times and the NY times this morning while I was at Starbucks. Also [...]

Backstory: I emailed my mom about getting free Starbucks and a free Krispy Kreme when you vote.
How do they know you really voted? Any way I just read that fat women have more sex than skinny women so if you’re in the mood eat a donut!  xoxo Mo

Hi Babe,
There is a family in the end house and they’re sweet, talkative to the max, but very sweet.  The mutants remain
Yeah, we were sort of expecting the Obama win here…disappointed, but we’ll just have to see how it pans out…there was a big run on the gun stores before the election here [...]

Me: I’m registered to vote!
Mom: Yahoo!  Barack & I can rest easy now
Me: I will be at the polls on the 4th, but I won’t wear any Obama shirts.
Mom: It would be a neat idea if obama supporters could figure out something to wear that is nondescript but would signify unity in a wink [...]

Liz!!! I was walking the dogs (my major preoccupation now) and guess what??!! I found another Obama sign in Krum!! YES!!! on that little road off 6th street going to the town baseball field and library. I was so excited I almost knocked on their door and said lets get together Tuesday for a watch [...]

Oh, and Obama wants me to join him in Chicago on Election Night.  I think I’m going to be too busy biting my fingernails and throwing up.
Your friend,
MA

I have a little bit of a headache this morning.  We decided that the only way to watch the debate was to take shots every time she said maverick or heck or darn or doggone or nucular.

When you get a chance, ask your dad about how he almost killed Al Gore.  It’s a good story.
-Mom

He is still sexy and one of the best speakers in politics. I don’t blame Monica

Backstory: this is my mom’s reply to a Howard Dean mass emailing urging support for Barack Obama. this is a mere exerpt. she’s on some new hormones at the moment.
Howard, is this really you? This is the second time you’ve emailed me this week! My husband’s going to find out about us. Here’s [...]