Of Course I’m At Work!

Me: Are you at work?
Mom: No, I’m in front of the television eating chocolate bonbons. Of course I’m at work!! The work ethic is an important part of my overall make up. I woke at the crack of dawn (9:00 am), Set my hair, went to Costco, Did a load of laundry, and came in to work to sign a document for Christine. Around 4:00 I plan to drive over to Christine’s to deliver said document (because I am a giver) and drink a Diet Coke or wine with her. So don’t act shocked that I am at work.

Love,

Mom

STOP YELLING AT ME!

Mom: what are you doing?
Me: working.
Mom: did you eat lunch today? i think you need to eat more.
Mom: hello??? HELLO???
Me: WHAT?
Mom: why all caps? is that like yelling? are you yelling at me?
Me: i’m not yelling. I’m WORKING.
Mom: you brat – you’re yelling again!

Office Hijinks

Backstory: Working in the same office as your mom…

me: wanna go make out in the executive bathroom? i have the key…

Mom: i’m not that easy

me: i’ll throw in a gucci handbag

Mom: throw up in a gucce??!

me: whatever.

Mom: whatever…



Love, Mom